60-ish Day Update
I haven’t updated my blog for a while and so much has happened the past few months, it’s hard to even know where to start, so I guess I’ll just start rambling, like my brain is usually doing anyway, and hopefully it won’t come out as jibberish.
So, in September I lost my job at Mangrove. Went three months without a job and then I was hired as a Payroll Specialist for a company on December 17th. I absolutely loved the place, LOOOVED the people, etc. and yesterday, 1/24, I was let go. This is the first time in my life I’d been “let go” from a job because I wasn’t good enough. I’m having a hard time dealing with the word “Failure”, which is so clearly written on my Employment Termination Form. “Failure to successfully pass probationary period.” Long story short – I made a few too many mistakes on people’s paychecks and the company didn’t have the patience to keep me past a month to help me learn the system. It’s too long of a story and won’t change or fix anything to tell it, but I feel like I was completely set up for failure, particularly with last week’s payroll (which was the final straw). Anyway, so I’m once again unemployed. If I hadn’t just written it, it would almost be like it never happened since it’s been so long since I’ve written! lol
A lot happened in December as far as my personal life and I won’t go into too much detail, simply because those of you who know me well enough and would happen to read this, you already know what happened and what I’m talking about and out of respect for the people involved, I’m not gonna parade around my personal issues and deface those involved. But the result being that things are better now than they ever have been. I’m extremely happy with my personal life and feel like I’m the luckiest girl alive.
Dustin turned 9 years old a few weeks ago. As usual, it was a difficult day, but I can honestly say that this year was probably the best ever. Nothing “special” happened for his birthday in particular, but my emotional support system was so much stronger thanks to open communication and love, that I felt myself take a big step this year. I miss him as I always do, and I ache (selfishly) to know what he looks like or how he’s doing in school, the normal every day things, but that isn’t something I can control. One more year without an update, but at this point I’m used to that. I’m ready to really move forward with my life and allow myself to believe that I deserve to be happy. I do deserve to be happy and from this point on, I’m gonna do what I can to make that happen for myself. No one controls my happiness, but me.
Harmony is pregnant and due the end (ish) of June and I’m super, extremely, immensely excited!!
Bart got a raise last week, because he’s just that awesome and although he still doesn’t make as much as I think he DESERVES to make, it was a good surprise that showed him a little that they do notice how hard he works and that he deserves it.
A couple weeks ago, I reconnected (IN PERSON) with a friend (Bubbles… AKA Brittany) whom I haven’t actually seen in about 9 years, and it felt amazing. Like that’s about all I can say about that at the moment. Amazing. She’s pure awesomeness in a can. Like Spaghetti-o’s. Or tomato soup. (mmm… I want grilled cheese)
Jimmy was released from prison the beginning of November and he’s doing really well. We’re doing pretty good as friends and Bart’s the most amazingly supportive person ever. Pretty much.
Lets see… I got Donkey Kong (Wii) for Christmas, because Bart’s about the coolest person alive. I also got it from his mom, which was odd (clearly they didn’t coordinate gifts this year!) but they’re still awesome. This Christmas really was just about the best Christmas I’ve had in years. Not gift wise, but family wise. It was an amazing feeling to spend so much time with both our families this year and I’m extremely lucky to have the family that I have. Including Bart’s.
Um, well I can’t really think of anything else to update at the moment, although I’m sure I’ll think of something later… Maybe I shouldn’t go so long between updates next time (?) So that’s all for now. I think. Yup… we’re good.
1 Comment
I love this post….so happy that things are going well and you are looking towards the future. Your line, “I’m ready to really move forward with my life and allow myself to believe that I deserve to be happy. I do deserve to be happy and from this point on, I’m gonna do what I can to make that happen for myself. No one controls my happiness, but me” really resonated with me. I keep trying to remind myself of the same thing. It’s not always easy but we ALL deserve to be happy and a lot of it is within our control if we would only realize it.