Posted by destiny on December 22, 2009 in 2009 Entries |

I figured if I added a cute, cheery theme on my blog, maybe it would cheer me up a little.  I don’t feel a whole lot better, but I gotta admit, the bright colors and overall idea kinda made me smile.  I can revert to thinking of all my good memories of this time of year.  There have been good times.

On Saturday, my family got together up at my parent’s house and had dinner and kinda just goofed around.  We did a silly “white elephant” gift exchange (thanks to Lena and Harmony for covering me on that one, because I didn’t know about it ’til it was too late for me to get something) but it was a good laugh.  Got to spend some time with my nieces and nephews (Lena had Nevaeh there and she always brightens my mood just that much more :)).  It was fun and nice to get out of the house.

That same evening though, Bart sent me a text message and informed me that his Grandma had passed away.  It hit me a little harder than I would have thought, but maybe that has a lot to do with the fact that I’ve already been really sensitive and emotional lately.  I already tend to be sensitive around this time of year, but to add everything else that’s been going on the past couple months, I think the smallest things set off the trigger in me and the result is always ridiculous, uncontrollable tears.  Grandma Mower may not have been my “real” Grandma, but she still meant something to me.  Maybe part of it is that I know he must be hurting about it and he doesn’t talk about it and the feeling of Lisa losing her Mother, which makes me imagine how I’d feel if it were me and I lost my Mom.  I don’t think it matters how old parents get, it can’t be any easier when you lose them.  Her viewing is tonight and the burial tomorrow morning.  She always made us laugh.  I wish we had made the time to visit her more often.  There’s no point in feeling guilty now though.  It’s too late.

I finally finished Dustin and Shelton’s blankets (finished the second one last night) and I feel terrible that once again, I have waited until almost the last second to get it to them.  I probably won’t get them to Social Services tonight either, because of the viewing and I still wanted to wrap them.  So, I won’t get them there until tomorrow, then Magui and Geary will have to deal with going there to pick them up, etc.  I feel so guilty.  I really need to make a conscious effort next year to get their presents there AT LEAST a week in advance so they don’t have to deal with running out at the last minute (or having late presents if they don’t have time to get them).  I haven’t got Dustin’s birthday present yet either, so hopefully I can do that next week and get it their earlier than one day before his birthday!

Anyway, enjoy the “cheery” blog theme for now.  :)

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