Thursday
I couldn’t think of a Title for this blog. I just felt like writing.
First of all, I’m very saddened by the passing of my 11 year old nephews iguana, Iggy. I’m not sure if it’s a curse, or a gift that I have always had a VERY strong connection with feeling sympathetic for other people. I mean, realistically I didn’t care much about his iguana and when it comes down to it, death is just a part of life. I have lost so many pets in my lifetime that people would think that the death of a pet wouldn’t even phase me, but it never gets easier. Iggy wasn’t even MY pet, but I’ve found myself fighting tears almost all morning. I am just simply one of those women that can honestly say “I cry when you cry”. I wish I could be with my nephew right now to give him hugs. Sigh.
Ok, enough of that, I’m almost crying again!
My real reason for getting on to post (now that I’ve darkened the mood with sadness):
This morning when I was getting ready for work and running quite late I might add, I got into my closet and after doing a super fast skim of my options for a shirt, I grabbed my white button up blouse that I bought about a year ago. I love this shirt and I always feel good in it, although it’s always been “awkward”. Because of the way it’s made, the top of the sleeves are always just slightly too tight and it bunches around my belly where my flab pushes out. Often by the end of the day, I would feel claustrophobic and frustrated with this shirt and tear it off the second I got home from work.
I haven’t worn it for about 2-3 months now and simply grabbed it because I was running late and didn’t have time to be picky. As I proceeded to get ready for work, throwing on a bit of makeup, quickly flailing through my hair with a curling iron and brushing my teeth, I stopped dead still for a moment and started twisting around a bit (as much as I can with my cracked painful rib) and lifted my arms up, then down a few times. I thought “wait a minute… this feels different…” That’s when it dawned on me: The sleeves are not tight! Wait, and woah, the belly of the shirt isn’t tight! Oh my! Am I losing weight? *HAAALLELUJAH*!!! I LOVE this shirt and I feel SO good today. It’s so comfortable not having my arms squeezed in the sleeves. Sometimes I wonder how it could be possible for me to be losing weight because of how inactive I’ve been the past week 1/2 with a cracked rib, but I am! Maybe my extra anal attention to eating healthy foods is paying off! 
Guess what I have also discovered?? I have muscle under my flab!!!! I can now FEEL the ab muscles underneath my fat. I’m so thrilled with that, I don’t even CARE about the flab anymore, because I know that muscle EXISTS!!! HEHEHEHEHEHE! It’s amazing what small things do to my moods. I feel so good about myself, just simply knowing that I’m TRYING now.
In closing – My Biggest Loser TEAL Team ROCKS! I love them!
Now – This morning when I looked in my bank account and saw that my paycheck was direct deposited, as usual, I was quickly reminded of the consequences of taking time off work. For the Lake Powell vacation, I left early on the 27th and took the 30th off, therefore I was short about 12 hours, as I was aware that I would be, on this check. I just didn’t really realize how much it was going to affect my pay. This is the smallest check I have had during the entire year that I’ve worked here. I’m trying really hard not to get overwhelmed by the fact that I have barely enough to pay my current bills and that’s IT. If I’m calculating correctly, I may have about $27 left after everything is paid for. *Sigh*. Next month will be my official 1 year mark at this company at which point I get the gift of Paid Vacation. I only get 5 days a year, but hey, that’s better than nothing! Usually when I take time off, it’s just one day because I plan our “vacations” on weekends. Well, I was aware of it when I made the decision to take the extra time off for Lake Powell and I’ll just focus on how much fun I had and it was worth the extra day… besides, it’s only 2 weeks until I get paid next 😐